Let's Talk About Depression
Depression- you know, the leech that just sucks the life out of you. It’s hard. It’s draining. And well, to be quite frank, it simply sucks. Louie, Katie and I are all clinically depressed, and while we’re always there for each other, this bout of depression has been extra challenging for us and just feels like it’s kicking us all in our butts. Some days we all feel great, some days we all feel like crap, and then there are days where 1 or 2 of us feels good and we’re able to help the other. To be honest friends, I didn’t put much of my face on Instagram last week because of this, and it’s been a real struggle this week too.
It’s admirable how many people think we have a perfect life, but let me stop you there- we absolutely do not. It’s so easy to portray that on social media, but we vowed to always be transparent about our journey, and depression is just part of it. I wasn’t diagnosed with depression until I was in my first year of college, and I’m still learning to navigate how I feel and what works for me when I do feel low. It doesn’t get any easier when Katie and Louie are feeling low too. Sometimes we clash and need space from each other, and sometimes we have a major cuddle puddle sesh on the couch (those are my fave tbh). Throughout our 6 years of being together and dealing with depression, we’ve definitely learned a lot about each other and ourselves. Here are a few things we’ve learned along the way:
Sometimes we aren’t each other’s remedy, and THAT IS OKAY! Because guess what? It’s impossible to be everything for a person, and so I’m grateful for friends who uplift us. Katie, Louie and I all have different things that help center us and bring us joy. When Katie feels really low, she hangs out with her friends as much as possible because new energy just revitalizes her. Louie likes to drive around or take time to himself to recharge, and if affection is something he needs, then he lets us know. My remedy is the gym and meditation. It’s the holy, sacred space where I let myself go and feel myself become centered with each workout and deep breath I take. I feel myself seamlessly become grounded as I listen to binaural beats and become one with the Divine. Find what helps you, and do it!
It’s okay to do nothing too. If your body is asking for rest, give it what it’s asking for!
The negative voices in your head about your self-perception are just negative voices. Don’t make them your truths, but try to speak affirmations over yourself.
Sometimes depression can cause us to view things from a narrow lens, and it’s really hard to see what reality is.
How you feel is 100% valid. It’s okay to not feel okay, and there’s no need to justify what or how you feel.
Seek out help. Don’t let ego tell you that you don’t need help, that you’re not worthy of it, or that you’re crazy for doing so. Katie and I both go to therapy, and Louie works with a life coach. To be honest, the three of us have even gone to therapy together. It’s helped us unpack our feelings, emotions and assumptions, and learn our triggers so that we learn to navigate through them.
So friends, if you’re dealing with depression, you aren’t alone. You will have good days and you will have bad days. Make the best of the good ones and savor them! If you’re faced with a bad day, press on. You are stronger than you know.
Xo,
Raq
